Just when you think these events couldn’t get more awful, the Code Pink ladies show up. I would sooner gargle broken glass than attend this hell-circus tomorrow.

From Wonketteer, national treasure and unsung hero americanscandoanything, with an assist from your editor:

The Night Before Tax Day

Twas the night before tax day
and all through the land
not a wingnut was stirring
they were making a plan

Their teabags were hung from
John Deere caps with care
like trucknutz for those
 ironically impaired

The children in bed
they couldn’t sleep late
with visions of book burnings
fueling their hate

And with Momma’s gun
and my flaming cross
we’ll show those libtards
just who is boss

When out on the lawn
there arose such a clatter
ACORNs! I cried
(we proceeded to scatter)

I went to the window
determined to know
and there saw the vision
The great El Rushbo!

He started to speak
as proud as King Tut
sweating profusely
with a cyst on his butt

the commies are coming!
a whole New World Order!
with a new global currency
and a turnstile’d border!

The gheys, they are married!
that’s one of their ploys
(although he enjoys buttseks
with dominican boys)

Fascism is here!
we barely have time
if you need any proof
just look at a dime!

Socialist diatribes are streaming
from TeLepRomTerz!
patriots in FEMA camps
black helicopters!

I say it is dire!
I say it is urgent!
the commies in Oregon
they’ll take our detergent!

Now Malkin! now Hewitt!
now Bachmann! Cavuto!
now Paultards!, now Birchers!,
yes, even Menuedo!

And then he fell silent
and finger’d his nose
(though what he was snorting
nobody knows)

But as he went off
into the darkened night sky
I thought that I heard
a disturbing cry

It seemed that it came from from
the phallus he puckers

Happy Tax Day to All!
Thanks for the ratings suckers!

Dear Teablogging,
My name is Susan Godwill, i just went through your profile when i was searching
for love, I have no options than letting you Know that I am infected and affected by your profile. that is why i wish to have a relationship with you, I will also like
to know you the more,And i will be very greatful to have you as my loved one. so i will like you to reply back to my private email address Above  i will also like to send you my pictures for you to know who i am.I believe we can move from here.

But bear in mind that Love has no colors barrier, no educational back ground barrier, no
socio-economic Barrier, religious, language, nationality or distance barrier,
the only important Thing there is love. I am waiting for your mail.
 
Please try to reply me directly private email address here that will be more confidence for me.                     
 
Thanks for your cooperation

J. Peter Freire’s had enough of the criticisms amounting against the movement. After all, a lot of meanies from the left have been bashing Tea Bagging because of what it really means. Luckily, a small group of blokes are apparently ready to redefine it to mean “a hate of taxation without representation” or “standing up against pork spending.”

You see, the protesters are idiots for referring to a historically recognizable protest, because it could easily be mistaken for the Urban Dictionary no-no word describing a lewd sexual act. But when Shuster and his chums at HuffPo gurgle the word themselves, it’s because they’re being meta.In a race to the bottom, Shuster and Co are tunneling.

Later in his post, Freire goes after claims that Tea Baggers are receiving financial help:

Well, as the lead organizer of the February 27th Washington tea party event, I’ll happily tell you that I got no such support. None. Nada. Zilch. The support we got from Fox News? Does that mean coverage?

Clearly one man’s statement  on American Spectator completely rebukes all arguments to the contrary. The Tea Bagging movement is not only a brand new term, but it is completely grass roots.

We can just let FireDogLake do the talking:

Newt Gingrch’s American Solutions has been hailed by right wing bloggers like Soren Dayton and Matt Lewis as “the conservative MoveOn,” and they are playing a big organizational role in tomorrow’s Tea Parties. But according to IRS documents filed by American Solutions, they have paid out over $4 million in the past two years to Moby Dick Airways, a company that charters private planes for Presidential candidates and the RNC — something MoveOn has never done.

Whoops! Newt Gingrich exposed as a hypocrit? Who would have thought?

Now we don’t want to startle you, but we’ve actually got some *original content* to put up here. As you may know, teabagging is all about secessionism, so heroic TIT Iolanthe has a message for you: 

GO SECESSIONISTS!!! GO SECESSIONISTS!!! I will help you pack! I will rent you moving vans! I will even throw you a goodbye party! Let’s make this like a relatively friendly divorce. Pick a few states and set up Wingnuttia or Jesusland or Christendom or Randland or whatever-the-fuck! Here … let me get that for you! Do you need some help with those boxes? I’ll get the cat kennel. Can I make you a sandwich for the road?

I wish you well, just well away from *me*!

Or y’all could go to Somalia and JohnGalt it *there* — your kind of place, Libertarians. Tiny feeble government; no services; not much of anything, really. You could all pull yourselves up by your bootstraps and form little Galt Gulches everywhere!

Leave us to our Effete Socialism.

The end.